Tuesday ramblings/3Ms/Whatever...

Quick post to keep my name out there - got to keep my cred up you know.

-Here's an amusing story from the good folks at the Banner-Herald. I think my favorite is the one guy's sarcastic mouth-off to the cop - "Have you been drinking or have I?" - classic - maybe that's why Wifeicek tells me to keep quiet on the way to and from a game. Though, I think we've all suffered from "exploding bladder" before - though I've never showered it's glory down upon Hooters patrons before.

-New bowl predictions are out for the Dawgs:

• Ivan Maisel/ESPN.com: Peach Bowl vs. Boston College (12/30)
• Mark Schlabach/ESPN.com: Peach Bowl vs. Boston College (12/30)
• collegefootballnews.com: Peach Bowl vs. Boston College (12/30)
• cbssportsline.com: Peach Bowl vs. Clemson (12/30)

Well at least we achieved some consistency among the prognisticators. Again, this means absolutely nothing - I am still holding out hope for a great finish, two SEC teams in the BCS and a trip to Tampa.

-Wifeicek and I went to see the original "Halloween" at the FABULOUS Beechwood here in Athens last night. Seeing that slasher classic brought up an interesting conversation between Pasqua and I today - which is superior: the campy monster/babysitter stalker films of the 80s (Friday the 13th, Halloween, Nightmare on Elm Street) or the new breed of gore-centric torturefilms a la Saw, Hostel, etc?

Now that's what I call scary...and amusing at the same time.

I am a STAUNCH advocate of the former. These new films have lost the sense of fun and enjoyment that the old 80s movies had. The 80s films played the gore and horror for fun and camp - the new films force little children to rip out their loving father's intestines out to find a key. I miss the days when I could watch Michael Myers rip off a philandering boyfriend's arm and then watch so much blood shoot out it could fill Gulf of Mexico. I miss the shots of the heroine throwing the knife down next to obviously not dead monster. Now all we get are twisted serial killers torturing people on screen and its not even the least bit scary...just disturbing, brutal, and evil. Thoughts?

Quick Pop Culture Hits

50 minutes until "Heroes" so I figured I'd spat off a little pop culture to pass the time...especially since I just watched the Mark Richt Show and I still don't want to talk about GA/FL.

Has anyone seen Scorsese's Mean Streets? I watched it for the first time over the weekend as it was just one of those movies I needed to see...especially after watching The Departed. I need to talk about this movie with someone. Just not what I was expecting.

Another great episode of Saturday Night Live. Borat makes the opening introduction and he kills it...making me even more excited to see the movie. Almost all of the skits got me to laugh, especially the two gay guys from New Jersey on Weekend Update played by Hader and Armisten. One of the best musical performances on SNL in recent memory by Beck (Red Hot Chilli Peppers last year is up there too even though I'm not the biggest Chilli Peppers fan). Beck's second song was extremely creative, a mix between Beck and something you'd see done by Stomp. At one point, the crowd starting cheering because what was happening on stage was so impressive. If you've given up on this show because of the last few seasons, it's time to come back.

You know I watched the season finale of Flava of Love. That New York...what a ho. And now she's going to have her own show? I truly enjoy discovering other square white dudes like myself who are addicted to Flava Flav and his show. It's almost like finding someone else who's as big a fan of Newsies.

One of my favorite bands, Guster, announced that they're coming back to Atlanta. Please do try and attend this show with me. Feb. 17. Write it down. Last time they were in town I had to miss the show in order to take the annual trip to Chicago for some White Sox games. What a team this year's White Sox turned out to be. Ugh. Another one of my favorite bands, The Decemberists were in town this past weekend and I had to miss yet another show I was dying to see. Why? Because I wanted to travel out of town and watch a crappy team that I love. Double Ugh.

That's enough on the music scene for now. I don't want to step on the toes of our boy MT Jammo Hammond and his frequent music entries. Speaking of Michael Todd Jammbone Hammbone, a big congrats to him on passing the Bar. I think I speak on behalf of everyone when I say that you should go work with that law firm on Fox that has commercials that focus only on the mouth of the defense attourney.
Hey you. Yes you, Michael. It's me. The gay dude from Dawson's. We need you. I need you.

And one last sports tip. Thoroughly enjoyed the article from Bill Simmons on Red Auerbach. I guess I had no idea how much Auerbach did once he stopped coaching. Simmons is one of the few writers that can explain the emotion of an entire city when an event occurs. Granted, he only really knows about the Northeast, but I digress.

Picksies

Just wanted to let you all know that I went 6-1 in my picks (see below) for the week. Why, oh why, did I take South Carolina in the parlay after taking Tennessee on the bloggah? About as smart as my decision to switch to Red Bull and Vodka at 10:00 because I needed a "pick me up". If a "pick me up" is defined by vomiting uncontrollably for 20 minutes...then a "pick me up" is what I got.

Saturday night I said that I was proud of our team at least 1,200 times. And I still mean it. No way am I going to go into a "bullet point" presentation of what went wrong/what went right. I'm just going to say that this team showed me a lot of balls in this loss. Unfortunately, they also showed me a lot of dropped balls too...Ouch...that's not right.

Hard to explain why I'm proud considering we played a sloppy game...but I just am. Let's leave it at that.

That's all for now. If I write more or think more about UGA, I'll probably start to cry and vomit (or cromit).

My College Picks

I went to get on the bloggah last night because I wanted to take my time, ease into these picks like driving an old Ford, touch them, smell them, love them. And what happens? Darn Bloggah is busted up so I couldn't take the necessary time to analyze and scrutinize my each game. Granted, I usually make the picks in under 5 seconds after looking at the lines...but it's a LONG 5 seconds.

Stanicek and I usually divvy up the games so we don't overlap and we consistently give you an astonishing 18 games (36 teams) of analysis and expert opinion. The fact that we're not getting paid for doing these picks week in and week out is a crime. But we love to do it. We love our readers. But more importantly, we love ourselves. On that note...

This week I'm just picking 9 games (Stanicek may have covered some of these) since I'm under the gun to get these done. Oooo, that ryhmed. My picks in bold:

Notre Dame (-13) at Navy
See that handsome mug to the left? I'll give you one guess who's college picture that is. If you guessed Charlie Weis, YOU'RE CORRECT. And you win this wisdom. Take Notre Dame. They're ready for a break out game after a couple of squeekers and Brady had that look in his eye like he was ready to kill a wildabeast with his bare hands after he threw the TD to Smar...F it...I'm not even going to try and spell that Polack's name. p.s. How did Weis go from looking like that, to this?



Wisconsin (-22) vs. Illinois
What did I tell you about Juice? This kid's the truth and if there's one coach who knows how to get his team ready for a road game in Wisconsin, it's Zook??? Really, is that true? I don't know. Just take the dam* points.

Florida (-13.5) vs. UGA
No comment. I'm going to pass on this game. Me picking UGA over and over has worked as well as my upcoming decision to switch to liquor in T-Minus 12 hours.

Vanderbilt (-9) at Duke
Best team in the nation against one of the worst? How is this only a 9 point spread. Bad decision by Vegas. Almost as bad as Nate Robertson's glasses. Can somebody tell this guy that it's not 1952 anymore? I bet he goes and gets some licorice whips and a malt for $.10 after handing the World Series to the worst team to be crowned...maybe ever. F-ing Tigers. Making the AL look bad.

Tennessee (-3.5) at South Carolina
Great description of these types of lines by Josh. This is a really tough game to pick and I've been staring at this line for over 20 seconds. I've seen UT on the road in person and I've seen South Carolina play at home in person. I'm going with the team that impressed me.

GA Tech (-5) vs. Miami
Nerds vs. Thugs. Do you think Miami has this picture hanging up in their locker room? I bet the players slap it kind of like "Play Like a Champion Today". Hell, I hope every team does that whenever they play GA Tech. Who are we kidding...they probably just get into a circle, bounce up and down, and swing their helmets at eachother to break noses, crack skulls, and "get fired up". What a program.

Auburn (-18.5) at Ole Miss
Auburn has been less than impressive against weak opponents. They're stealing games when they could dominate. Just like Otto stole that crap from the Korean supermarket in "Top Chef" on Bravo. Please tell me other people watch this show. It's the best thing going in the reality TV genre. Didn't you love when he "bowed out" of the competition? And what's with that bit*h throwing him under the bus right in front of Chef Tom? Couldn't she have said something to poor Otto before it was in front of the head honcho? Seriously, anyone watch this show?

LOCK OF THE WEEK

Texas (-10) at Texas Tech
Seriously, like you didn't know that was coming. They came through for me last week and there's no reason to believe it won't hit this week. Well maybe the fact that Texas has DOMINATED this matchup in previous years is reason for concern...but I say pish and posh. Texas Tech at home is like Rock going up against Scissors. Screw the 10 points...take the money line.

9 hours until I am airborne and on my way to Jacksonville. I'm a Rocket Man. And yes, I'm definately running scenarios through my head right now about how we're going to pull this game out. Sssshhhhhhhh...shhh. UGA is not only going to cover...we're going to win.

Friday Pick 'Em - JAX edition

Sorry to dissapoint you my literally ones of fans but this is going to be a DRAMATICALLY scaled back edition of the weekly picks...no pictures...little write up...but with all of the same wholesome picky goodness you've come to expect of Stanicek. I apologize but Jacksonville awaits goodsirs.

That being said, it was another tough week here at pick 'em clocking in at 4-5. Ahh, remember the heady days of 10-1? I think we all do.

Remember to check out Josh Massey's Picks De La NFL.

As always, Lines courtesy of Danny Sheridan (10/26) and should be relied on about as much as smoking a victory cigar in Jax...

Auburn (-17) @ Ole Miss - so I get burned GETTING 19 points with Ole Miss against Arkansas last week, now its only 17 against Auburn? Screwah yah MahCluhstah.

Miami (+6) @ Ga. Tech - Tech watches in horror as Miami players win, record impromptu rap video on the 50.

UGA (+14) vs. Florida - Dawgs win. World peace achieved. Swine takes flight. Doritos become health food.

Oklahoma State (+6 1/2) vs. Nebraska - I shall follow Josh Massey's logic.

Texas A&M (-4 1/2) @ Baylor - Franchione wins bet with Satan, soul earned back, TAMU rolls.

Texas (-11 1/2) @ Texas Tech - Somewhere Pasqua breaks framed portrait of me over his knee.

Purdue (+3 1/2) vs. Penn State - The only scary about Penn State is the alarming weakness of Paterno's bladder.

NC State (-1 1/2) @ UVA - NC State wins but when Amato screams at ref in third quarter in that "yet to hit puberty" voice of his, Dan Evans' head explodes

LOCK O' DA WEEK (Record....nevermind...alright fine...1-3):

Clemson (-4) @ Virginia Tech - Watching Spiller and Davis run last week helped me achieve Nirvana.

Season Record: 23-15

Podcast 7: Podcast in Space

A few things:

• Here it is...35 minutes of auditory heaven...the Cover Two Podcast (though I do feel that since I haven't missed a session since Podcast One it should be the Cover Two/Pasqua and Stanicek Podcast...though that is wordy, so how about the Pasqua and Stanicek Podcast? PERFECT!).
• I felt I needed to set the record straight on SNL - I have (as has my wife....Wifeicek) called for a complete overhaul of the cast and writing team. Apparently Pasqua and I have different thoughts on what constitutes an "overhaul". Ditching three cast members (who were incidentally some of the strongest on the show, Chris Parnell anyone?) PURELY for cost-cutting reasons and losing your headwriter so she can pursue sitcom opportunities does not an overhaul make. I am talking about a full scale, complete, utter, atom-bomb reorganizing of the show a la 1995-1996. That year they dumped every cast member (except for Tim Meadows) and completely overhauled the writing staff. So I humbly propose that after this C- season mercifully concludes that SNL dump EVERY SINGLE castmember (except Bill Hader), dump EVERY writer...pray to the Gods that Adam McKay returns as head writer (shades of "Studio 60"?) and all becomes right with the world again.
• Look for a very brief edition of the Friday Pick 'Em later today - why brief? Cause it be Jacksonville time babbbbeeeee!
• Read a story about a Fantasy Congress league yesterday where you draft Congressmen and earn points if they successfully move legislation that they propose/sponsor through Congress and eventually to the President's desk. I thought - "Finally a fantasy league that might actually be of use to me" - so I started a league....if you are interested go to this site: http://www.fantasycongress.us/fc/ , get a login ID - go to "join league" - type in my league name: Yo Bama and the password: kennedy and you are on your way.

Pop Culture as random as a Gator in a Collared Shirt

I haven't had an entry for a little while. My sincere apologies to the all the Pasqua fans/readers out there. All 3 of you are dear to me. At any rate, a lot has been going on in the Pop Culture/Sports genre lately and I needed to be sure to give my 8 cents worth of opinions.

• "Hero's" on NBC is officially my favorite new show of this year. It's replaced "Studio 60" as the show I just can't miss every week. If you've been watching, you know what I'm talking about. If you haven't then catch up immediately at nbc.com. There's a lot going on and a pretty thick plot already established. And the guy who can teleport has, alright I'll say it, reached "cute" status. The scene where he got excited over waffles being on the menu in the diner last week has made me laugh all week thinking about it.
• Flava of Love concluded last week on VH1. Can you believe the season finale was the highest rated show in VH1 history? Me too...it's a quality program. New York went down like the skank she is and I really hope that Flav and Delishious have a lasting relationship together. And yes, I wrote that last line with a straight face.

• SNL had another solid weekend with probably one of the funniest monologues I've ever seen. Stanicek seems to think that this cast needs a complete overhaul and to get new writers. Ummm...isn't that what they did this season? Got rid of Fey as the head writer and replaced her with Seth Myers and Amy Poehler. They also got rid of Chris Parnell, Horatio Sanz, and Rachel Dratch. While I hate to see those veterans go, I LOVE what Jason Sudekis, Bill Hader, and the other new chick can do. These kids are the wave of the future. The wave of the future. The wave of the future. Q-U-A-R-A-N-T-I-N-E.
• Back to real pop culture. You can now listen to Flava Flav's new album. Where does this piece of music rank with the best albums of our generation? I'll leave that open for debate.
• While I may have lost some of you with that last bullet point, I want the rest of you to know that I am super psyched for this weekend in Jacksonville. The Friday night drunk conversations about how "If we can only keep it close ANYTHING can happen" to the first sight of a Gator fan in jean shorts to the warm Florida weather to Tent City dominating yet another college football venue. It'll be a grand weekend.

Keep an eye out tomorrow and Friday as we'll be putting together the college football picks. Fear not, I won't be picking the UGA game this weekend. My 0-3 record on UGA picks makes it obvious that the only way we win against Florida is if Stanicek predicts our game. That and if we tackle, block, catch, out play them on special teams, out-coach, win the turnover battle, win the war in the trenches, play smart, ................................................

Hall of Fame banter....

As next July is officially like...uh, under a year away...I am becoming increasingly giddy thinking about our trip to my parents home in Cooperstown, NY to see the greatest shortstop in baseball history inducted into the Hall of Fame. Cal Ripken, Jr. will soon take his rightful spot next to the revered greats of the sport and we will be there front and center to watch it unfold. The excitement got me thinking...who else was eligible among Cal's class (except of course for Tony Gwynn)? A little research yielded the following list of those eligible for first time induction in the upcoming years:
---------------------------------------------------
*Players eligible for the first time for BBWAA election
2007:

Harold Baines, Derek Bell, Dante Bichette, Bobby Bonilla, Jeff Brantley, Jay Buhner, Ken Caminiti, Jose Canseco, Eric Davis, Tony Fernandez, Tony Gwynn, Darryl Hamilton, Pete Harnisch, Charlie Hayes, Glenallen Hill, Ken Hill, Stan Javier, Wally Joyner, Ramon Martinez, Mark McGwire, Paul O’Neill, Gregg Olson, Cal Ripken Jr., Bret Saberhagen, Jeff Shaw, Kevin Tapani, Devon White, Bobby Witt

2008:

Shawon Dunston, Travis Fryman, David Justice, Mike Morgan, Tim Raines, Randy Velarde

2009:

Mark Grace, Rickey Henderson, Dean Palmer, Dan Plesac, Matt Williams

2010:

Andres Galarraga, Edgar Martinez, Robin Ventura
-------------------------------------------

Ouch. Outside of Gwynn and Ripken...it's some slim pickins. But I submit to you the following list of players that certainly worthy a long hard look:

2007:
Harold Baines -

Looking good as an Oriole

Relevant #s:
-22 seasons, 9908 ABs, 2866 Hs, 384 HRs, 1628 RBIs, .289 BA, .356 OBP
-6 time All-Star
-Had 100+ Postseasons AB with 5HRs and a .324 BA
-His 1628 RBIs are 23rd All Time

Baines was one of the iconic hitters of the 80s and remained VERY productive throughout the 90s with the A's, Orioles, White Sox, and Indians as a DH and clubhouse leader. Though he didn't ever win an MVP (only finishing as high as ninth in MVP voting in 1985) he was a model of hitting consistency and if Dave Winfield gets in I say Baines gets in.

As for the rest of the 2007 class - sorry Canseco and McGwire you are forever tainted by steroids and if you get in and sully the Ripken/Gwynn love fest I will not be held responsible for my actions. Paul O'Neil will earn some votes out of NY but his numbers just don't warrant serious consideration (2105 Hs, 281 HRs). Other interesting candidates:
-Tony Fernandez - seemed destined to land in the Hall as late as 1993 but injuries and inconsistency sunk him.
-Gregg Olson - to this day threw the best breaking ball I've ever seen. An Oriole favorite of mine if injuries didn't catch up to him he might have been one of the best closers ever.

2008:
Tim Raines

Look out! Rock's 'bout to run!

Relevant #s:
-23 seasons, 8872 ABs, 2605 Hs, 170 HRs, 1330 BBs, .294 BA, .385 OBP
-7 Time All Star
-3 Times in the Top 10 MVP voting
-The big number though is 808 SBs, 5th All Time.

Again, like Baines, you don't talk about the greats of the 80s without mentioning Rock. The guy flat out flew on the base paths and remained a useful player off the bench up until his retirment in 2002 (he batted .303 in 90 ABs in 2001). I think Rock will suffer, again, like Baines, for not being dominate over a shorter period of time. Instead being a player that transitioned from dominant All-Star into valuable role player. Unfair.

Outside of the Rock there is no one. Dave Justice? Nope, injuries. Dunston? Nada...messed up names does not a Hall of Famer make.

2009:
Well of course Rickey is going to make it - unless he pushes back induction a few more years by being picked up for a late season run by the Yankees next year. But other than him - none of these guys has a shot. Mark Grace would come the closest with his 2445 Hs and .303BA - but if Gracey makes it so does Wally Joyner and John Olerud...and that...ain't...gonna happen.

2010:

So here's an interesting quandary - Edgar Martinez - very similar to Baines in many ways, 7 Time All Star, dominated DH for about a decade...but unlike Baines never transitioned into a platoon player and therefore failed to amass any eye-popping numbers. So what is a Hall of Famer? Does Baines not get any credit for the 10+ years he spent coming off the bench, platooning in Baltimore, Chicago and Oakland...and in fact does he get penalized for it as surely some will say that his numbers should be discredited because he was only "padding stats by lingering along well past his prime". Does Edgar get special treatment because of his chronic injuries, "Give him the benefit of the doubt, if he doesn't have those stints on the DL he would have amassed Hall of Fame numbers", but I submit this:

• Baines should be credited for his durability and constant value to all of his teams over 22 full seasons.
• Martinez's injuries made him unreliable and while unfortunate, kept him from reaching even the lower floors of suitable Hall of Fame numbers

The argument over whether a pure DH should be admitted into the Hall of Fame is moot here because while Baines did play the outfield for several of his first few seasons - both of these players were essentially full time DHs.

Martinez is seen as a dominant hitter over a short period of time. But it's not true - Martinez played over 18 seasons - however he was hurt for a significant portion of 6 of them. So those who make this argument are giving him credit for being chronically injured. Compare the following stats:

18 seasons, .312 BA, 309 HRs, 2247 Hs, 1261 RBIs, 1219 Rs

15 seasons, .303 BA, 284 HRs, 2176 Hs, 1205 RBIs, 1186 Rs

The top line of stats is Edgar Martinez, the bottom, Will Clark.

Point being Edgar was overrated and if anyone says he should get in and Baines doesn't get in I'll be ticked.

Thoughts? Comments?

No fall break for grad students...

By the by...you can't imagine how infuriating it is to walk around campus going to my stupid classes with all these smiling undergrads screaming to one another about how drunk they will be tomorrow night in St. Simons. Apparently what's good for the undergrads isn't good for the grad students?! There has to be some sort of legal violation thingy going on here right? Like...Equal...Proc......Due Protection?

3Ms on Tuesday....

No word on whether "3Ms" will be officially be moved for all eternity to Tuesday and become TMM, or TMS, or TMT, or some other acroynm...acroynm right? I always get that mixed up...anyway...on with business:

- This season is really start to boil my Rice-A-Roni. Is this some sort of punishment for the glee of the SEC Championship last year? Because I thought the Sugar Bowl made up for that. Regardless - we still can salvage the season this weekend in Jax...but you all know that. As for the game itself - Stafford made some questionable decisions but did we expect anything else from the freshman? But overall he made some key throws in big moments and we all breathed a sigh of relief on the Tripp Chandler TD as there are signs that the lock on the playbook is starting to be picked. So it's on the World's Largest Outdoor Pre-Halloween Georgia-Florida Football Based Type Event.

- As I did last week - let's take a look-see at where the experts have us going come bowl season....

• Ivan Maisel - ESPN.com - Peach Bowl vs. Boston College (12/30)
• Mark Schlahbach - ESPN.com - Music City Bowl vs. Wake Forest (12/29)
• collegefooballnews.com - Liberty Bowl vs. Tulsa (12/30)
• cbssportsline.com - Liberty Bowl vs. Tulsa (12/30)

So what does all this tell us? Absolutely nothing but Josh's dreams of a repeat performance in Tunica are certainly not dashed yet.

-We saw The Prestige and I saw Flags of our Fathers - I had not been in a theater in a little too long - anyway - for those who are interested in seeing The Prestige I won't talk about it and give it all away - except to say "don't see it - wait for DVD if you have to see it"...as for Flags I thought it was full of some incredible battlefield visuals, great sound, pretty powerful scenes but I felt it suffered the same fate as other war movies such as The Thin Red Line - there were a ton of white, buzz-cut soldiers running around and aside from the three characters the movie really dwells on it was hard to keep them straight. Someone would be shot, face covered in blood, then Ryan Phillippe would scream "NO...NOT FRANKIE!! Why...why...why Frankie?" and I was still wondering two hours later whether Frankie was Barry Pepper or Paul Walker or one of those other three guys that looked exactly like Barry Pepper or Paul Walker. But overall -well made and if you are pumped about seeing it I say go for it. If you could take it or leave it, wait till DVD.

Friday Pick 'Em

NOTE - For NFL picks please visit Josh Massey's Ye Olde House of Bloggery

Back again for another longwinded, most likely rarely read (or at least completed) edition of Friday Pick ‘Em. This week I dispense with the formalities and delve straight into the picks. Is it because I feel guilty shirking my school responsibilities to crank these bad boys out? Sort of. Is it because I’ve got a piping hot Cup O'Noodles waiting for me to scold my tongue on? No. Is it because I went 3-6 last week and have started a steady spiral downward with my pick success rate? Whatever...let’s pick...as always these picks are for recreational purposes and should be relied on about as much as me enjoying myself while in a costume at a Halloween party...

Lines courtesy of Danny Sheridan as of 10/19, picks in bold:

Maryland (-3) vs. NC State – A beeee-uu-tiful matchup of two squads that screwed me over last week. My hometown heroes, the Terps, down 20-0 at the half came storming back to win the game but failed to cover the spread by a point...oh the agony. Meanwhile NC State has roaring wins over BC and Florida State and then screwed the pooch by dropping one at home to Wake. As my great uncle Paddy used to say...”When yas need to decide between two who screwed ya, go wit da boys from where ya come frum.”

Uncle Paddy doing his famed "Drunk Off Jameson's and About to Start a Fight" dance...ah, happier times...

Ole Miss (+19) at Arkansas – Call me a suckah for Dextah Mahclustah but this is a lot of points to be getting against Arkansas. I know they beat Auburn but they still have a lot of holes and a lot of freshmen at key spots. I haven’t drunk the Arkansas Kool-Aid just yet but if they win by three TDs make mine Grape.

Is it too late to recruit this guy? He can run through fricking walls!

Notre Dame (-14) vs. UCLA – As I explained last week, I do these puppies on Thursday night...so to add some historical relevance to this entry (and also addressed by Pasqua)...as I type I just saw what may go down as one of the greatest plays in baseball history. Endy Chavez’s HR robbing catch quite possibly is the best play I have ever seen...and I watch A LOT of baseball...so much baseball that I started calling myself "Mr. Baseball" while I sit alone night after night ,alone in my duplex watching the west coast feed of Royals-Mariners games at 1am on the satellite baseball package screaming at Mike Hargrove to take out Ryan Feieraband cause his pitch count is WAY too high "GO TO RAFAEL SORIANO YOU DINKUS!", then of course Ryan Shealy rips a double in the gap and I jump up and down on my sofa hugging Mr. Smooshums (my pillow and imaginary bestfriend/pitching coach) cause I was right...yep, that's me...Mr. Baseball...hehehe...(sob)....like Tom Selleck....(whimper)...

THE CATCH....and a picture of what Dave Wannstedt and I look like without our shirts on.

South Carolina (-3 ½) at Vandy – Yeah, like Vandy ever wins.

Washington (+23) at California – I always thought Ty Willingham got a rawish deal at Notre Dame. Much like the raw chicken I ate once at a to-remain-nameless-restaurant in Augusta, GA (which incidentally was very expensive)...I mean seriously...we paid top dollar for that crap, I cut into my breast and a pink gooey mass was staring me straight in the face. Now I don’t know about you but I would much rather walk into Gyro Wrap with its (recently awarded) 60 sanitation rating, knowing full well that they cook their meat until you could wear it as sneaker soles, than pay 100 bones for a meal that includes a side of salmonella.

What is it? Who cares? Can I have mine with extra brown stuff and extra creamy stuff?

Arizona (+2) vs. Oregon State – What gives with these celebrity voiceoevers on ever dang commercial now? Does Madison Avenue think I am that much of an idiot that I will eat a Stouffer's Brand Ham Roll Up just because Josh Hartnett told me to? Well THINK AGAIN slime balls! From here on out I refuse to buy products from any company that tries to co-opt some celebrity’s status to push their devil products....unless it's Heath Ledger, with his rugged good looks and voice like butterscotch pudding, he could sell a rusty chainsaw to a drunken Serbian.

LSU (-33) vs. Fresno State – This is a struggle for me because I am almost positive that neither Les Miles nor Jamarcus Russell ever progressed past 4th grade. They always have the same clueless look on their face whenever they are in stressful situations, I think their inner monologue must go something like this, “Alright...focus. I’m (Jamarcus/Les) fu*king (Russell/Miles) and I’m the man. What did I do that time when we won that big game...sh*t I never won a big gam...hey is that my uncle up there? It sure looks like ‘em. Should I scream out to him? Did I miss his birthday this year? When is his birth...NO NO! I have to focus...focus...yeah, focus...that reminds me, should I buy a digital camera, I really want one but I should probably save up some more mone...”

Jamarcus fails to realize the play began as he was otherwise distracted by an ant crawling up the back of the center's leg.

Clemson (-7 ½) vs. GA Tech – I can’t tell you how much I love the name CJ Spiller. That guy just sounds AWESOME! Why doesn’t UGA recruit guys like that? Matt Stafford? Yawn. Thomas Brown? Give me a break. Charles John...{ZZZZZ}. Forget talent, go STRAIGHT for the names. First, look out for really great names like World B. Free or Sundiata Gaines. Second, look for names that will drive Lou Holtz crazy like DJ Shockley and Sundiata Gaines (“Gonorrhea Sames”?).

Unfortunately this is the far end of Sundiata's range

LOCK O’DA WEEK (Season Record 1-2) – So it’s bad – so is 2 year old mayonnaise...

Oregon (-3 ½) at Washington State – I’ll pull back the curtain on this one...I have never seen either of these teams play and guess what...can’t name one damn player on either side. But know what....the Ducks are gonna win, you know why? Because I was visited by the Archangel Michael late last night, he was surrounded by eyeless imps wielding razor sharp lances and were speaking in tongues, however, Michael stood alone on this post-apocalyptic hellscape and he assured me of it. So I got that goin’ for me, which is nice.


Woe be unto you heathen! Taste holy steel...and to the witnesses - take the Ducks they are 20-5 in Autzen ATS since 1999.

Overall Season Record: 19-10 ATS

Picks to live by

Phew. Starting these picks a little late because my fantasy NBA draft was a bit intense and ran overtime. I'm sure all of you understand. When does any fantasy NBA draft go according to plan. Am I right? If you'd like to know how my team turned out, just ask. But let me just say it started out with a little Finals MVP and ended with a little 1st rounder nicknamed "The Landlord". Man, he's one ugly Klingon.

I'm the Landlord. Enter at your own risk.

On that note, let's make like a little kid with a cold and get pickin. My picks in bold. ENJOY!

Pitt (-6 1/2) vs. Rutgers

Let me just say that the play Endy Chavez made in the 6th inning is probably the best play I've ever seen in a game 7. Maybe ever in the postseason. Maybe ever. If you haven't seen it, get to your nearest ESPN. Endy was a bit of an underdog going into this year much like Rutgers. It's a good time for underdogs this year.

Penn St (-18) vs. Illinois

Pop quiz hotshot. Which of the three "juices" will still be an every-day topic of discussion in the year 2073? If you said "C" you're correct. Why you ask? Because "Juice" Williams (picture "c" from above) led his team to cover the 18 point spread against Penn State on October 21, 2006. That's why.

Mich (-13 1/2) vs. Iowa

You know that redneck comedian who is in those Dodge truck commercials and screams "THAT THANG GOT A HENNE"? Well, I've seen him at the Punchline in Atlanta and he's really not all that funny and Chad Henne really isn't all that good so I never understood why he would always scream his name in those ads. Say what? How's that? Oh...he doesn't say "Henne"? He says "Hemme"? Hmmm...well that ruins my logic. Screw it. Go Hawkeyes. They can fly.

Miami (-17 1/2) at Duke

Can anyone really give an honest prediction of this game? What's the record for most backups to start in a game? That brawl last week was coco loco. I haven't seen a fight like that since I was sleeping the other night and dreamed I took that stupid UGA cop and beat him with my gold plated fists made of toaster ovens. And as he cried and begged for mercy I just chuckled and screamed "You are a fork tongued, Stamos-loving, donut eater!!!" Either way, I have to go with Duke here. Are there two other schools with better reputations right now? Somethings gotta give in this one...keep your eye on this game.

UGA (-18) vs. Miss St

OK, we lose this game and you'll never see another picture like this one. Don't we kind of look like the characters in Anchorman? Tim is smooth Papa Burgundy, I'm Champ laughing a little too hard at his joke looking like I miss his musk and am about to say "We should get an apartment together", Hart is Brian Fantana all slick with his sunglasses on top of his perfectly curved hat and probably just added another spritz of Sex Panther, Josh is Brick Tamland since he's clearly laughing at something that has nothing to do with the situation, and Dave is Veronica Corningstone since he/she's lustfully staring into her lover's eyes. Sorry Dave...and GO DAWGS!!!

Tenn (-11) vs. Bama

We need Bama to win this game if we're serious about winning the East. Oh, we're not serious? Good, because Tennessee is going to kick the Oreo Balls out of Alabama.

Fla St (-7 1/2) vs. BC

I told Lindsey that she could watch "Grey's Anatomy" while I work on these picks so I wouldn't pay attention to the TV. Yeah, like that worked. It's 11:13 in the PM and I'm still going strong (the NLCS is going to the Top of the 9th and is already an instant classic). Anywho, in this episode a couple is stuck together by the dude's pee pee ring. I've seen probably 1/3 of the all the episodes of this show and here's what I've seen so far. This dic*-ring incident, an episode where two people had a metal pole going through both of them and they were both calm as a cuc, an episode where a woman had uncontrollable orgasms, an episode (last week I think) where a boy had a tree trunk going through his body, and one where a dude had sex with his 50 year old patient in a bathroom at a bar. So here's my question. Does this show have 2 different teams of writers? Team 1 writes episodes involving ridiculous sex stories and Team 2 writes episodes involving some sort of impalement? Boston College only loses by 4...take the points.

Tex Tech (-2 1/2) at Iowa St.

Holy mastacholi. Yadier Molina just took Heilman deep. 3-1 Cards. My Mets in 7 prediction is looking shaky. Back to the pick...Texas Tech is like "Rock" in Scissors, Paper, Rock. Great team to gamble on. Sure they'll trip up and lose to a Colorado every now and then (hell, Rock loses to Paper once in a Blue Molina) but they're normally going to win. Just like rock. Good 'ol rock.

There you have it. I'm shutting down and watching the bottom of the 9th.

20th Anniversary (10/25 actually)

College football picks coming your way later on today or this evening. Hold onto your horses...this one's going to be a doozy (no particular reason it'll be a doozy...I just feel the need to doozify mine).

In the meantime, I wanted to share with you all one of the most ironic stories I've read in a while which makes me filled with glee this morning. I've hated the Cubs as long as I can remember. The arrogant fans who have never won anything but still made you feel like a second class citizen, the ballpark which is actually a slice of Hell, all the press they got since they were owned by the newspaper, etc. I don't think too many people understand the true hatred between White Sox and Cubs fans...it's much deeper than Mets/Yanks or any of the California teams. Check out this or this or this or this (my personal favorite that summarizes every reason I hate the Cubs that was written during the Cubs playoff run in '03 by a White Sox fan) to further explain.

While I don't believe in curses, stories like this new one about Buckner and Bartman sure do make me smile. I pray to the Baseball Gods that the Cubs never experience the sweet sweet nectar that is a World Championship. Cry on Cubs fans...and feel free to keep blaming other factors than 2 pansy pitchers, a horrible front office, and zero bullpen as to why you didn't win this year or next. Pinella has no clue what he's getting into.


"what do you think the cubs are doing right now!!!"

Album of the Week, by MT Jammo

Howdy all--

The following entry is from our Godson...Michael "if it ain't broke that means it gots a lot of money" Hammond. He's bringing the music portion to this pop culture blog so enjoy...

I've decided to stray from the new releases and stick to some of the top albums in my collection. This week features We Are Scientists and their debut album With Love and Squalor. We Are Scientists follow in the footsteps of bands like Franz Ferdinand and Bloc Party dishing out some quality post-punk tunes. Many have called this style of music "dance rock", but I say it just plain rocks.
These guys don't exactly look like rock stars. They seem more like guys you might call to repair your computer. Despite their non-threatening demeanor, dorks haven't kicked it this hard since Tim and I sang karaoke at Buffalo's Cafe after sucking down a case of cheap beer. This album starts out hard and fast with the opening track, "Nobody Move, Nobody Get Hurt", and cranks out quality song after quality song. Almost every track makes you want to turn up the volume and roll down your windows. That is of course if you're driving in or living out of your car. Either way, this album will make you feel better about your life for a short while. Just check it out and if you don't like it you can still use it as a coaster (check out the pirate in the upper left. Boo!)

Podcast 6 - Now with more herring references!

Though not up quite yet, the sixth edition of the Cover Two podcast should be up shortly...

3Ms - on Tuesday

So I didn't post yesterday...still recovering from shock and absorbing as much info as was humanly possible about the game just to make myself more miserable...it worked...and now it's raining...depressing.

Anyway - I'm sure no one is looking for a recap of the game at this point - but as Jmac pointed out, the tailgate was great. We ate like kings and luckily because of Jmac and Julie's irrational fear of leftovers Carrie and I have been treated to low country boil for the last few days.

So in lieu of weekend rundown - I give you a collection of things that are on my mind as of right now:

- In case you like to obsess over incredible meaningless and trivial things (come on...try it...it's fun!) here are the absurdly early bowl projections out there for the Dawgs:

• cbssportsline: Peach vs. Clemson (Atlanta - 12/30)
• collegefootballnews: Liberty vs. Tulsa (Memphis - 12/30)
• Ivan Maisel/ESPN.com: Outback vs. Penn State (Tampa - 1/1)
• Mark Schlabach/ESPN.com: Independence vs. Texas Tech (Shreveport - 12/28)

- So they pretty much run the gamut - I imagine there are also some Music City predicters out there. Point being - no one knows. But just to gauge interest - how likely is it that you go to any of the above predicted bowl games? Comment below. Right now I would put our chances at something like this:

• Independence - 0%
• Music City - 45-55%
• Liberty/Peach/Outback/Cap One/BCS - 100%

- In NFL news - I propose a formal partnership with Josh and his (hopefully) now weekly NFL picks column. I don't know what this partnership will entail besides linking to the columns. However, the partnership will be far from equal as Pasqua and I will demand a weekly stipend and tribute in the form of salty snacks and a live animal sacrifice of some kind.

- Carrie and I spent last night pursuing one of our new hobbies...watching the horrifically bad made for TV movies brought to us by the good people at the Sci-Fi channel. Last night's scare-du-jour? "Chupacabra: Dark Seas" which apparently has been renamed the "Chupacabra Terror" for DVD and mass release no doubt. This little slice of movie magic starred an obviously strapped for cash or just insanely bored John Rhys-Davies and can be summed up as two hours of a man in an elaborate rubber suit jumping up and down more than Mario when you accidentally sat on your control pad. Included the obligatory WAY TOO gory kill in which a man, now severed in half, picks up his entrails in stunned disbelief of what had just occured, the quasi-hot B actress in constant peril, her hunky protector, and the sleazy low-life that provides comic relief...almost escapes and then suffers are a horrific death much to the delight of those he had annoyed (including the audience) for the first hour and a half.

Ultimately - a decent sci-fi entry but no Pterodactyl (starring Coolio) or heck...not even Frankenfish

Crash or Frankenfish? Oscar missed this one.

Until next time...good bye and mahalo from yours truly.

This post is therapy for me.

I don't think I can put this loss behind me until I get some thoughts down on paper. Please excuse the lack of "funny juice" in this post...Daddy's just not feeling very humorous right now. Well, there is this.

• I said, on the way back to the tailgate, that wherever we're ranked it's too high. I was serious. We're 24 in the Coach's Poll. Do you think we deserve a Top 25 ranking? Me neither.
• The saying before the season was "Richt doesn't rebuild. He reloads." Riiiiiiiight. I'm starting to find peace realizing that even UGA needs a year like this to rebuild. Remember 2005 Tennessee? I still don't think we're that bad and will easily make a Bowl game but I'll gladly take a year of 7-4 if the next year we're competing to win the division.
• Our defensive ends are horribly overrated.
  
• Our entire defense has lost its quickness and its swagger. Late in the game when Martinez decided to start blitzing almost every down, we couldn't apply pressure. I've never seen blitzes develop so slowly.
  
• DJ Shockley, David Green, David Pollack, Boss Bailey, Terrance Edwards. If we have any of those guys still on the team we don't lose yesterday. Those guys were true competitors and would've put the team on their shoulders. There wasn't anyone to step up and get the job done. Well, maybe Stafford (I really thought we were going to see the beginning of the Stafford era yesterday. A few catches instead of drops and we probably do).
  
• I had a conversation with Coach Craft who had a conversation with a UGA coach before the season (I'm not sure if I should say which coach). the coach's main concern? The fact that the defense didn't have a true leader. The offense has Nick Jones to rally the troups, but the defense has nobody. I hope this changes soon. Kelin Johnson or Asher "Unbelievable Sights. Indescribable feeling. Soaring, tumbling free wheeling, through an endless diamond sky" Allen (yes, that is a line from the song "A Whole New World" in Alladin. I loved that movie as a kid. So what.) Someone on that defense needed to give a "This is Fuc*ing Vanderbilt" speech. There was absolutely no passion.
• Shame on the UGA fans for this weekend's game. The stadium was NEVER loud until the last Vandy drive. The upper deck wasn't packed and the game really wasn't a home field advantage.
• Joe T III isn't going to take another snap for the rest of his life. Not only does Stafford give us the best chance to win, he needs the experience. I thought he looked great on Saturday and I'm excited to see him next week.
  
• Does this game hurt us in the recruiting race? I wonder. You could spin it Urban Meyer-style and say "see...this is why we need you". I doubt this is a real issue.
• Is Will Muschamp ready to come to UGA?
  
• I just watched the preview for Flags of our Fathers. That looks like a winner.
  
• My apologies to the tailgating crew for my behavior right as we were leaving Tent City and back at Tim's. I was a bit...mmmm...testy. I never knew how I'd act if we lost at home to Vandy. Guess that answers that question.
• The fact is that we're just not a very good football team right now. Many things could've pulled out a win for us yesterday but they didn't. Mediocre football teams find ways to lose a close game every now and then. Ask Tech. They're experts. I see a lot of promise for the remainder of the year with this now becoming Stafford's team. Am I depressed? Oh yea, as bad as anyone...but I've finally accepted the truth. That is, unless we beat Florida and Auburn and Tennessee loses 2 more conference games and somehow South Carolina doesn't sneak in there. Then this team is DOME-WARD BOUND!!!! And we'd deserve the hell out of it.

College Picks...kinda

Okay. I have been crazy busy between preparing food last night for this weekend and writing a Herald article. Plus, I have a "job" that takes up 2-5% of my time. So, I didn't have time to do my college picks, yet my desire to entertain the readers remained. I knew I had to so SOMETHING, so below are some pictures that motivate me when I'm feeling blue. Enjoy. See my picks at the bottom...
























Navy (-3) vs. Rutgers. I like boats.
Bama (-14.5) vs. Ole Miss. I like tissues.
UGA (13.5) vs. Vandy. I like Dawgs.
Ohio State (-14) at Michigan State. I like shortcuts.
LSU (-26) vs. Kentucky. I like Mummys.
Michigan (-5.5) at Penn State. I like rain.
Va Tech (-3) at Boston College. I like picking games that happened Thursday.

Friday Pick 'em - More fun than a root canal!

Welcome back weary betters to your haven. Your grotto of greatness. Your Valhalla of victory. Your wonderland of wagering. Yessir, it was another successful week here for ole Stanicek as my nine picks finished a solid 6-3 raising the overall season record to a crunk-tastic [am I using that right? Is there some statute of limitations for coolness on words like “crunk”? Maybe someone should issue a manual each year of de-cool-ified words letting mainstream America know that you no longer are impressing your friends by using them. For example 1996’s manual might include “psych (notice the use of parenthesis within brackets...is that how you spell that? Is it sike? Cyc?) ] 16-4 against the spread.

Well enough chit-chat, on with picks (but one more thing...damn I love parenthesis and ellipses....why did Pasqua and I agree to do NINE picks...do any of you realize how difficult it is to come up with write ups on nine games?! It’s hard people! Add that on to the responsibility of publishing a weekly tailgating newspaper and now you’re talking a fricking 9 to 5 job. So feel free to give me cash the next time you see me), as always these picks are for recreational purposes and should be relied on about as much as I can rely on my self control when presented with a fresh tray of imitation crabmeat at an all-you-can-eat buffet....

Lines courtesy of Danny Sheridan as of 10/13:

#2 Florida (-2) at #11 Auburn – I mean seriously...have you seen Tuberville’s ears? I know this has been talked about ad-naseum but they are huge and astounding. It’s like the Grand Canyon, you’ve heard about it all your life and after awhile you start thinking “I mean, sure it must be great but it can’t be THAT great”...but you just don’t know until you see it. That’s what Tuberville’s ears are like...times ten.

Hey! You in the back! I can hear everything you're saying!

Maryland (-3 1/2) at UVA – My blind loyalty to my home state paid off last week and I shall follow that instinct again. And speaking of my home state...if JMac doesn’t use Old Bay, not some crappy generic brand, in the low country boil at Tent City this week...he shall be pummeled much like the unfortunate opponents of those viscous trained marsupials that were once forced to box for carnival goers entertainment.

Jmac...your future awaits. Take a look at that Kangaroo ref in the back...so attentive!

South Florida (-3 1/2) at UNC – A little glimpse into the magic of the Stanicek blogging process...as I type this I watch the VA Tech-BC game on ESPN’s Thursday Night College Football –and Boston College’s marching band just ripped into a rousing version of “Don’t Stop Believing” by Journey...what a waste. I can’t stand when respected university bands launch into some out-of-place music by some cheesy 80’s band just to garner cheap applause. God, it’d be like if the Redcoats played Bon Jovi.

Well no wonder they were so popular...the ladies must have LOVED them what with those "come hither" looks they were constantly giving!

#18 Oregon (-9) vs. UCLA – Thank God the good people at Hot Pockets have finally ditched that stupid little cardboard-aluminum (cardluminum? Alumiboard?) house that supposedly ensconced your Pocket in a vortex of heat when being microwaved. For those of you who eat Hot Pockets regularly (and please God, hopefully I am the only one...because they are bad) you will notice that in the last few months the folks at Team Pocket have ditched that contraption and now inform us that all we need to do is put our chicken fajita Pocket on a paper towel. Which makes me wonder...why was it there in the first place? Was I being duped into thinking that the only way to achieve that perfect balance of “core of the sun” hot on the fringes and icy cold in the center in my Pocket could ONLY be achieved via the use of the alumiboard? Well screw you Hot Pockets! I shall now only eat you once a week!

Oh sweet devil! Ugh...why do I eat these things?

Northern Illinois (-3) at Western Michigan – Basically the only thing I’m going on in this game is that I know ONE player on either team at that player is three foot four inch Northern Illinois running back Garret Wolfe. The same Garret Wolfe who has racked up 6 billion rushing yards and a googleplex of touchdowns so far this year. So if you like to bet on games based on ZERO actual analysis and little justification then take this game...and come to think of it...all of my games.

UAB (-5 1/2) at Rice – Am I the only one that can’t stop thinking about Chinese food every time I hear that some team is playing Rice. MAN, I just did it again! I’m serious...they could be playing for the National Championship against UGA in Pasadena and all I could think about would be “Rice?...Rose Bowl? Mmmm....rice bowl...HEY! Could anyone go for some lo mein or sesame chicken?”

NC State (-3) vs. Wake Forest – I am officially putting Wake Forest on “Season Tailspin Alert” after choking with that huge lead against Clemson last week. This alert is serious Wake, I put Tennessee on it last year they didn’t pay attention and you know where they were come bowl season...picking the lice out of each others hair...which is where they are most bowl seasons but I digress. Wake disregards my warning and falls to Chuck “the Baby-Eater” Amato.

That devilish smirk almost screams "Hey, is that a baby?!" And if you don't know what I'm talking about, well then you haven't been keeping up with our podcasts now have you?

Arizona (-3 1/2) at Stanford - So what is the deal with “Donnie Darko”? I just watched it again the other day for the second time and I still can’t begin to tell you what the H is going on. Yet, I still like it. Is it that freaky bunny? Is it the Swayze-factor? Who knows? It fascinates and perplexes me. If anyone can explain it to me feel free to warp yourself through a time travel portal back to last year, the first time I saw it, and tell me...feel free to bring “Frank”.

This is the most normal picture I could find from the movie

LOCK O'DA WEEK (Season Record for Lock o'da week: 1-1)

#19 Missouri (-1 1/2) at Texas A&M – Taking Mizzou after TAMU came through for me in such dramatic fashion last week? Betrayal you say? Well consider me Judas because I’m done with the Aggies...use ‘em and lose ‘em that’s what I’ve always said since the ten seconds ago when I first typed it.

So I just realized that I didn't pick any underdogs this week...ugh...oh well...what are you gonna do about it? Bring it.

Season Record against the spread: 16-4

Double A

These interviews with UGA players always KILL ME. Check out some of the most recent interview with Asher Allen (who was actually coached by our friend Steve "90% mental, 9% will, .5% heart, .5% mustard sauce" Craft). Here's a few of the quotes...



Q: Who was your favorite teacher in high school and what was your favorite subject?
A: My favorite teacher was Mrs. Walters, a Spanish teacher who is now at Parkview High School. I had her all three years and she helped me a whole lot. She was tough but she'd ease up on me every once in a while.
HAHAHAHA...TAKE THAT COACH CRAFT!!!!

Q: What TV do you watch you don't want anybody to know about?
A: I'm not ashamed. I watch "SpongeBob." I'm a cartoon kind of guy.
Q: What's your favorite movie of all time?
A: My favorite movie ever has to be "Aladdin."
Q: So he'd qualify as your favorite Disney character?
A: Yeah, Aladdin.
Q: Who is your favorite Tailgater?
A: The dude that was on the front page of the AJC. Screw all those Matt Tovrog haters.

Ok, I made up that last line. Or...did I???

Has their ever been a show that has better previews than The Nine on ABC? The past two weeks when this preview would come on during "LOST", I continually told myself that nothing, not even a Tereshinski break dance, would make me miss this show. Then, come 10:15, I always find myself zoning out and wondering why all the girls of Laguna Beach find Cameron so desirable. The guy's like a Tereshinski pass (he doesn't have a lot behind him).

So there's my bloggy for the day. A weird interview with Asher Allen, a great headshot of Coach Craft, and two HORRIBLE Tereshinski references.

Here's some good Thursday morning crazy for ya....

Excuse me if I get a little serious for a second...

How did this article by long-time Georgia political columnist Bill Shipp not get more attention from Dawg fans, the administration, and/or the blogosphere? In it Shipp essentially argues that:

• our football players are complete morons;
• the only reason Georgia wins is because we schedule weak/Div 2 teams;
• we don't "compete" in the SEC;
• our football and basketball players "couldn't pass a real first year English class on a life or death bet";
• that only national championships every year are acceptable if our players are going to be this stupid;
• it's not fair to call the athletes "students" because it's not fair to the other students and it makes them look bad

Today's AJC gives a different side to the story, new numbers indicate that the Georgia athletic program is not the den of mildly retarded, 3rd grade level mouth breathers that Shipp insinuates. As for Shipp attacking the men's basketball team's grades...I think we have all accepted the fact that while Harrick was commanding his squad, grades were the least of our worries. If we went on the road under Harrick and managed not to rob two liquor stores and commit 5 NCAA infractions I considered it a success. So don't throw Harrick's graduation rate around when bashing Richt and Felton.

Finally, I think we're all mature enough to acknowledge the fact that a lot of student athletes are given preferential treatment as far as admission standards in exchange for the success they may bring their team and our school. However, I know I would not want to be the one that has to wake up at 5:30am for mat drills, weight room at 6, breakfast, class until 3pm, practice until 7, study until 10...repeat. So excuse me if I don't shed a tear for Lassiter Trenton Huffington IV from Cobb County not making it into UGA where he will spend his days drinking himself into a coma, in lieu of a kid from Claxton, GA who feels like his only shot of making it out of abject poverty is his scholarship to play football at UGA. It is patently unfair for Shipp to lump ALL student-athletes into his "moron" group, stay out of sports Shipp and stick to the even more depraved, vile world of politics.

Podcast 5...Like Rocky 5...only good....

This week's podcast is HERE and features a live interview with the man in the center of Cherrishinski-gate....Pasqua! Sit back and enjoy...

Lidle

I thought this was an interesting background story on Lidle and his hobby. What a shame.

A few thoughts for Wednesday....

• I would certainly recommend a trip to the theater to see "The Departed". Not quite the tour-de-force "better than 'Goodfellas'" experience that some are touting but still a worthy addition to Scorsese's catalogue.
• I am sitting at Walker's drinking some coffee here in beautiful downtown Athens while typing this and there are four people at two separate tables sitting outside...one group has smoked continuously for almost 40 minutes. Finish one, immediately light another, finish one, light another, rinse, repeat. Needless to say their skin has the tone and texture of the canvas bag Jimmy "Corncob" Atkins, the longest serving rider on the Pony Express, used to deliver parcels to frontiersman. At the other table, two late twenty somethings sucking down multiple PBRs....at 9:45am on a Wednesday. Ludicrous right...alcohol in the morning....freaks. Maybe they're tailgating for tonight's Tchaikovsky performance by UGA's ballet troupe.

WOO-HOO! F 'em up! Land that grand jete!

• I'm going to throw this out there....the "Friday Night Lights" TV show isn't as bad as I thought, in fact I kind of like it. It isn't as "Varsity Blues"-y as I feared it would be. That's not saying it couldn't go that direction in later episodes and we watch in horror as the series descends into the cheese-filled cesspool from which James Van Der Beek emerged. Speaking of...that's one guy I hope I never see again...if he could just convince Josh Hartnett and Katie Holmes to join him on the isolated commune where he now grows organic turnips and knits hemp socks, my triumvirate of hated Hollywood actors would be purged for good.

Who needs sleeping pills? Just play a tape of Katie Holmes delivering lines in "Batman Begins"...insomnia cured.

• Vandy comes to town this weekend. Cherish these games friends...we only have three home tailgates left...they go by so fast.
• Speaking of the foosball - I was having this conversation with Pasqua yesterday...where are your top 3 desired bowl destinations this year (outside BCS bowls, of course...they would be on top)? I bring it up only because I really don't want to go to the Peach Bowl. The whole fun of going to a bowl is the road trip, the experience...and an hour drive to Atlanta just doesn't qualify, especially considering that's where we were last year. I was thinking...
• #1 Orlando (big game, free happy hour at Embassy Suites, and we can try and convince Disney characters to join us in Tent City
• #2 Tampa (horse races...decent, easily accesible bars...and horse races)
• and finally...this is tough...Dallas would be fun but faaaaar. Almost would be too far to drive and hence maybe impossible to make. So what about Memphis? I know it's the fricking Liberty Bowl...but it would also mean TWO trips in one year to Tunica. Toss up. Thoughts?

Wonders of YouTube....

I'm not quite ready to celebrate AJ Green's commitment to UGA because A LOT of things can happen between now and signing day 2008...2008! That's a long time. But for those of you that are interested....here's a few clips off YouTube of Wonder Boy!

Long Live Cherrishinski's...and other UGA news

Rivals.com has reported that Conrad Obi de-committed from UGA last week and is opening the process back up. We're going to be a little thin at linebacker next year but with the likes of Dewberry and both Akeems, I say piss off Mr. Conrad. If you don't know that UGA is where you need to be, then I say leave. Unless you re-commit...then we'll gladly take you back. But, for now...SCRAM!!! Unless you're ready to come back.

Huge news for 2008!!! We recieved our second recruit for 2008. If this article describing A.J. Green's talent doesn't get you fired up and want to skip the next 20 months...well...than you just don't bleed red and black like me.

NOW, probably what we've all been waiting for. With the outbreak of freaks looking for ANYTHING to blame Saturday night's loss on, I have to say this...HAHAHAHAHA. The smell of jealousy is more pungent than a whiff of my breath after a spoon full of Cherrishinski juice. Why Cherrishinski juice? Because we ran out of Cherrishinski's...THAT'S how popular they are. A tailgate without Cherrishinski's is like having a tailgate without beer. What's the point? So if you want to continue to pin the blame on me and my Tent City friends, go ahead...see what I care. Hell, you can even stop by Tent City on Saturdays if you desire...I'm sure you'd like to take a break from your 2 chair, 1 cooler tailgate.

My thanks to Josh, Dave, Stanicek, JMac, and everyone else from the TC crew. And another special thanks to Mr. Kessler for taking the time to cover the Athens tailagting in the fall.

Oh Cherrishinski, I love you. I'll see you Saturday baby.

Just to make myself feel a little better....

Florida still has to play Auburn and then us.

Tennessee still has to play Alabama, LSU, Arkansas, and South Carolina.

There's a chance for us...right? RIGHT?

My 15 minutes

I was just informed 640 AM in Atlanta was discussing the article and were questioning "if Matt Tovrog is insane for drinking grain alcohol 10 hours before kickoff." Hmmm...maybe they have a point. But, if I'm nuts...we're all nuts.

If you haven't seen the story, check it out here. My sincere apologies to anyone who talked to Kessler at the tailgate and didn't get mentioned.

That's all for now...I think Stanicek is about to post something fresh and hip any minute now.

3Ms....

Monday Morning Minute takes too long to type...try it...M...o...n...d....see? So now it's just 3Ms.

Also note - there are no pictures to accompany this post...for some reason blogger won't let me upload today.

So obviously the big thing on everyone's mind coming out of this past weekend is whether Google really is going to shell out almost 2 billion bones to acquire Youtube? I mean WOW...those two guys that started that website better take that cash and run.

Or...we could talk about the Yanks getting eliminated from the playoffs and now apparently are ready to fire Joe Torre!? Wow again. I know there is something to be said for shaking things up after a tough loss...and it was pretty shocking to see this Yankee squad go down. But firing Torre?! The guy has become a legend and I have never heard one ill word regarding how he handles the clubhouse, a roster full of prima donna veteran all-stars, and/or a meddling owner constantly second-guessing everything he does. I don't think the answer is Pinella, a fiery in your face kind of guy. Let's see how long it takes Sheffield/Giambi/etc to go to the media after the first Pinella blowup in the clubhouse. This is a bad move Georgie....get some solid starters and a reliable middle reliever...that's what will get you another Series.

Or we could talk about movies (Carrie and I saw "The Departed" yesterday)...music...

Alright...let's stop beating around the bush, cut to the chase, clear the air, and any other cliche you can think of. The game was a nightmare. It tends to sting when you are up big, holding all the cards, and then have those cards snatched out of your hand and then beaten about the face and body with said cards. As for thoughts...I think JMac and the Realist at the Cover Two did a good job of showing both sides...the horribly disgruntled side and the optimistic side of the game.

If someone wanted my opininon regarding the QB situation I would say it's time to give Stafford the ball. He's lost his redshirt and if our senior is going to go out there and make the kind of mistakes that Richt was worried a freshman might, than why not just let that freshman learn from those mistakes? Build toward the future and give the ball to next year's QB this year.

That being said...we had a FANTASTIC time at the pre-game tailgate. So much fun in fact that the AJC deemed it worthy of front-page news. This story has caused quite a buzz...apparently all of Atlanta is now lining up and taking sides: are you with Pasqua and the Cherreshinskis (incidentally that was the name of Elvis' first band) or are you against them? Those in the anti-Pasqua camp weighed in here. As a friend of Pasqua and rabid-devourer of Cherreshinskis count me in as at least somewhat to sort of behind the Mayor. I say let's start a huge letter writing campaign to the AJC and the blogosphere...show your support for the Mayor! Don't let these n'er-do'-wells frame the debate!

Bloggin for Dummies

If you scroll down and read my post, please ignore the fact that I have ZERO blogging talent. I can't "crop". I don't know how to "subtitle". I have very little "blogging knowledge". And I rarely "wear underwear".

3 of those 4 weaknesses are true.

Pick'em yick'em rick'em - PART ONE - Pasqua's to follow...

I pray that all of you, dear readers, took my picks last week. Took my picks all the way to some off-shore account and now find yourself relaxing comfortably. Lounging in a hammock watching the sun set over the Pacific on some uncharted island in the South Pacific sipping mango juice and rum out of a frosty glass.

Yes indeedy...if you were paying attention you would have noticed that my 11 picks last week went 10-1...TEN AND ONE against the spread. Now, I definitely am one to toot my own horn so I will say that 10-1 is REMARKABLE...toot freakin’ toot! 10-1 as it may....sorry I just can’t stop saying it...10-1, 10-1, 10-1...try it, its fun.

Anyway a new week calls and its time to muss up that sterling record. On to the picks, as always these picks are purely for entertainment and should be relied on about as much as relying on Pasqua not to make fun of you when you ask him if “I look good in these male Capri pants?”

(Sheridan’s lines as of 10/6) - Picks in bold

#2 Auburn (-15 ½) vs. Arkansas: Do you know what tigers do to true freshman quarterbacks starting on the road? I don’t know either, that’s a stupid question. But I do know that I hate Arkansas because they hired Mustain’s high school coach on to their staff just to get ole Mitchy to sign. Incidentally, that would be a great season finale to “Friday Night Lights” (yes I watched the first episode, wha-you-gon-say ‘bout it?)

Book...movie...TV series...when does "Friday Night Lights ON ICE" start touring?

Alabama (-28 ½) vs. Duke: Has there ever been a spread big enough against Duke? Seriously, I could see Wofford (-43) at Duke, take the bet, put on my “Go Terriers” pocketed tee and matching rip-away pants and not think twice.

Pittsburgh (-7) at Syracuse – I love Dave Wannstedt’s mustache. Seriously, he looks goofy as he** but the kid sticks with it. You would think at some point his wife, close friend, heck...even his priest might say “Dave, it rocked in the 70s but it’s time to let it go”. He would then go up to the bathroom say goodbye to Juan (he named it in 1982) and then come down the stairs to a cheering family like in those makeover shows. Oh, and Tyler Palko is good and will throw for good stuff and that’s why they cover.

After years of practice Wannstedt perfects the face that fully accentuates "Juan"

Ole Miss (+2) vs. Vandy – Gives me another chance to chant DEXTAH-MAH-CLUH-STAH!! And Vandy favored at Vaught-Hemingway is like Rue McClanahan being favored in a game of Chutes and Ladders against Estelle Getty, just...ain’t...gonna...happen.

Wake Forest (+16 ½) vs. #15 Clemson – Wake’s at home. Biggest game for them in decades. Chansi Stuckey is out....did any of you ever stop at Stuckey’s on trips on the interstate? I remember seeing them when we would go the beach in North Carolina and always thinking...”Ugggh, who would eat something called a ‘log roll’”. Seriously Stuckey’s, can’t the marketing department come up with a better name? I hate foods with the word “log”, “loaf”, “roll”...hmm, but I do like egg rolls. Yeah, egg rolls are great especially when you dip them in that sweet and sour sauce. Man I’m hungry. What were we talking about?

OOOO! I want mine with extra log!

Maryland (+15) at #18 Georgia Tech – Take this with a grain of salt kiddies. I am playing homer here for my Terpies. However, I will say that the Fridge is going to be pumped to ruin his old team’s season AND they had a bye week to prepare. Does that mean they will shut down Calvin Johnson? Probably not, but I think they’ll come within a couple of TDs. Sorry...that wasn’t funny....so here’s a picture of this...

Could someone please help me find my dignity

South Florida (-6 ½) vs. Connecticut – What is the deal with these Applebee’s commercials with famous chef Tyler Florence? Like I’m supposed to believe that some 5-star chef is in the back whipping up my Veggie Patch pizza with a side of cheesy fries? Get real Applebee’s...stick to those sap-tastic commercials with basketball coaches hanging up pictures and dejected high school football teams stuffing their faces with tater skins to dull the painful memory of Billy hitting the upright to lose the Super Regional semi-final. Don’t pretend you’re anything more than the 7th or 8th choice on everyone’s “Where do you wanna eat tonight” list. Go Rams!

Interested in being a sell out? It's easy...ask me how.

Texas A & M (-2) at Kansas – No amount of failure is enough to punish Franchione for what he did to those Alabama players. TAMU win this one even though they have completely psychotic fans that claim to be “the nation’s most passionate and dedicated” but are closer to “the nation’s must homicidal and coo-coo freaky”.

LOCK O’DA WEEK:
Virginia (+6) at East Carolina – I can’t abandon my Cavs now, not after their she-lacking of Duke last week. But UVA...come on...when’s that mascot of yours going to come out of the closet? Not that I have a problem with it whatsoever. In fact I’ve been a staunch advocate of homosexual mascot rights for ages. I was the first to support the UT musketman’s decision to wed the Stanford tree. All I’m sayin’ is I feel for your overly flamboyant Cavalier prancing up and down the sideline knowing that he is bottling up his true self in side.

It's OK...you're among friends...

Season Record: 10-1

Pasqua's picks pickled peppers. (That's what I would talk if I got the lead role in "P for Pendetta"

Hey Hey Hey everybody!!!

True story: I was about 3/4 of the way done with this blog entry AAAAANNNNDDDD...power goes out. Pasqua loses everything. DRATS!!!

So, I'm starting from scratch and you'll have to excuse me if the explanations for my picks are a bit brief. Especially after I just found out that Coutu is not only gone for Saturday...he's gone for the season. What a 55 yard kick to the stomach.

Sooooo, on with the picks. We're doing this week's college action 1/2 and 1/2 style (just like I like my creamer. Coincidence or horrible analogy? You decide). My winning picks are listed in CAPS BOLD.


LSU + 1.5 at Florida
Hmmm. LSU is already in CAPS. Double drats. Anyways, this game reminds me of "The Outsiders". UF plays the role of the socials, what with Urban Meyer, Chris Leak and that pretty boy Tim Tebow. They keep picking on teams with less talent and are due for a beating. Man, I hope it rains in this game just like rumble in the movie...that would be scary ironic. Throw in the fact that we're all going to be rooting for LSU at our tailgate and I take the Greasers getting a point and a half.



Geaux Tigers
Win one for Pony Boy

ILLINOIS + 7.5 at Indiana
Da Da DAAA PU-LINI as my buddy Nick calls them. They manhandled Michigan State last week and if there's one thing we've learned about Illinois football it's this: Never EVER hop off the Illini train when it starts-a-chuggin. Oh, and never EVER bet against a freshman QB named "Juice". The Zooker is back BABY, and he's bringing some extra "Zook sauce" to these Hoosiers...or, as my girlfriend calls them "Who-see-iers" (she was looking through my movie collection and goes "What's Whoo-see-iers". So, we watched it and she was asleep after 20 minutes. God love her.)

Navy + 2.5 at AIR FORCE
Planes beat boats any day. Fly Air Force, Fly!!! (see what I meant about the shorter picks. You didn't believe me...but I don't care. I don't.)

WEST VIRGINIA -20.5 at Mississippi State
This West Virginia team might be the truth. Too bad we've never seen them play in person. Shhe shh. NEVER. How many more 3 and outs does Slyvester Croom need to put together before he gets the boot? Watching Croom's offense is like listening to my buddy Coach Craft talk about the top high school guards in the Northern half of Cobb County.



MSU alum after another
3 and out


Oklahoma + 4 at TEXAS
It's the 1 year anniversary tomorrow of this article. So, because of that (and that alone), I'm going with Texas. Reason being is 3 fold: 1. John's our friend. 2. He's from Texas. 3. He mentions a "Craft" in the article...and I like Craft.

MICHIGAN STATE +15.5 at Michigan
You have to hand it to Michigan State only losing by 4 to Illinois on the road. They've seen the best the Big 10 has to offer and now they're going to bring it to Michigan.

SOUTH CAROLINA -4.5 at Kentucky
Ummmm....are we forgetting that South Carolina won this game 44-16 last year? And Syvelle Newton at quarterback brings an added dimension to the "Cock and Fire" attack. They're coming off a game against Auburn that they could've won so SC has everything going for them coming into this game. BLLLLECKKK, that sounded like some actual analysis of this game. Here, this'll relieve the boredom.

We interrupt these picks to let you know that Lindsey just scored 2 FREE TICKETS FOR TOMORROW!!!

Back to the picks.

Missouri +5 at TEXAS TECH
I just scored free tickets...and Texas Tech scores a lot.

And it comes to this. The pick of all picks.

Tennessee +2.5 at UGA
Am I making this pick with my heart and not my head? Maybe. Should I be worried about UGA's woes these past few games and the fact that we're losing our All American kicker? Absolutely. Had I not read the following write-up from a distinguished alumnus I probably would be taking UT. The alumni knows a guy from the Athens Banner Herald and this is what the ABH dude had to say

My buddy at the Athens Banner Herald has been hanging around the team and in the weight room all year, but a lot this past week. While he was there, like most Dawgs, he couldn't resist and got there in time to watch the football team work out. He told me that there were a lot of guys present(didn't notice anyone that was not there, if that makes sense) and that they were working out to 5 different, equally excruciating versions of Rocky top. He said in his opinion that the level of focus on the task at hand and intensity is at a level it hasn't been since he has been working his job just under a year, but working as journalist involved with UGA football since 04.

Told me Joe T3 is heavily wrapped, but he has appeared ok, and will be the starter of course, and that there seems to be a confidence in the offense again, he said the new-found confidence being tied to the starting qb would not be completely accurate from his point of view. He said that he expects to see plenty of Stafford no matter what and this got me very fired up...

Two guys have been staying together to work by themselves for at least an hour after practice so far this week. Matt Stafford and Mo Massaquoi. He said that the feeling he got in the weight room was that of being in a room full of pi$$ed of Dawgs, literally. He said that their is a quiet belief we could really pull off something to rearrange the expectations for this team in a major way. He said he is getting the feeling that the team thinks they could pull off their best home display since LSU 04. That is the goal at least.

So there you have it. I'll see everyone tomorrow. And...as always...

GO DAWGS.

Pasqua