Tuesday, January 30, 2007

Top 10 for Da Bears

There's been a debate amongst several, J-Mass and my co-hort included, about which team a casual fan should be pulling for on Sunday. I call it a "debate" even though in my mind, the argument is about as debatable as curley vs. home fries from Arby's.

Granted, I had 16 solid years in Chicago as a youth and pull for all things Chicago except the Cubs or Chicago native Isaiah Thomas...so I can't call myself a "casual fan". What I can do is give you some overwhelming evidence as to why you should pull for not only the Bears on Sunday...but for the city of Chicago.

10. Real city vs. Fake City. Anyone ever been to Indianapolis? Me neither. On top of that, the Colts aren't even Indianapolis'...they're Baltimore's. Root for a real city that has a team that's their's. Plus, the Bears have a team song...and I love professional teams with songs.

9. The Owners. Look at the background on Jim Irsay from the Colts. He was GM when he was 24 because his Dad bought the Baltimore Colts. So you're going to root for the male version of Paris Hilton??? Plus, this guy had a legal battle with his stepmom, he's a drug addict, and his Dad is from CHICAGO!!! Or, you can root for Virginia Halas McCaskey aka "Mama Bear", Daughter of "Papa Bear" George Halas. Did you see when Virginia was wheeled out to the field during the NFC Title Game? I haven't teared up like that since Juan Uribe dove into the crowd for the 2nd out of Game 4 in 2006. Her family is the face of the franchise and you can't buy tradition like that.

8. The Food. Polish Sausage, Italian Beef, Deep Dish Pizza, and a popcorn joint where people stand in line for 2 hours just to get a couple of bags of poped corn (don't believe me? Well, I did it Christmas 2006). Anyone who's ever had an authentic Chicago deep dish would be willing to tell you that it's so good. How good is it? It's so good, that they'll root for the city's football team that the pizza derives from. I couldn't tell you what an Indianapolis delicacy is...but I'm willing to wager it's got a cottage cheese base. Gyyyosh.

7. The Fans. We all know about the Superfans. I always wondered what the average American who has never been to Chicago thought about that skit. Think it's a little overdone? Well, yes, maybe a little. But these guys exist. Any non-believers should've come to my next family reunion. When you go to Soldiers Field you'll probably never see a more jolly bunch of "oversized" adults in team jerseys and parkas bearing (pun intended) the Chicago logo at one time (Lambeau might be the only exception). Who are these Colts fans? A bunch of pansies who are still trying to get over the depressing news of Al Unser Jr's DUI and get to sit in a Dome every Sunday? Where's the fun in that? P ull for the fans of Chicago. They are you. They are me. They are we. They are America.

6. Sports Significance. As you heard in the "Superfans" skit, the Bulls are "a pleasant diversion to Da Bears" which was the truth even during the 90s when the Bulls created a dynasty. The rankings of sports importance in Chicago goes like so:
  • Bears
  • Cubs (F'ers. But it's true. Funny how that happens when a team is owned by the newspaper)
  • Bulls
  • Sox
  • Blackhawks

I have to imagine the rankings in Indy go like this:

  • Indy Car Racing
  • Hoosiers
  • NBA - gotta pull for those Pacers
  • NBA (this one is actually the National Ballet Assocation. HUGE in Indy...Go Twinkletoes!)
  • Colts (or as Indy fans call them..."who?")

Root for a city that lives and dies by the Bears. UGA fans like me should sympathize for Chicago Bears fans who've been waiting for a title since 1985. I know I know, Indy has never won a Championship...but do they even care? It's like NBA fans pulling for the Hawks to win it all because Atlanta has never seen a basketball championship. WE COULD CARE LESS...same goes for the Colts "fans". Next time the Hoosiers are in the Finals, pull for them (as we all did in 2002 because that's Indy's real love), but leave the NFL to a team and city that actually cares.

5. Underdogs. J-Mass had a point about this in his blog but it isn't valid. Sure the Bears say they've been underdogs all year, which I admit isn't true, but the fact remains that all experts were picking the Saints last week and those same analysts are picking the Colts this week. If you're a fan that is watching a game with no allegiance, don't you always pull for the underdog? Who wasn't pulling for George Mason last year during the NCAA tournament? I'm not saying the Bears are George Mason, but the fact remains that it's much more fun to pull for the dog. Indy winning by 6 would be like kissing your Great Aunt Gladys.

4. The Aftermath. I've been trying to find a youtube link to the 1986 parade in Chicago to celebrate the Bears Superbowl, but I couldn't. Believe me when I say it was mayhem. There would be another Superbowl parade in Chicago should the Bears win, but that's not the most exciting part. What I'm really stoked about would be the inevitable re-make of The Superbowl Shuffle with this year's team...and hopefully the lyrics would be just as tacky. Can you imagine this?

I’m Tank Johnson and what do you know?
I tackle running backs and I’m still on parole.
Chicago Bears are the best and we’re taking over nations.
If you want to be my bodyguard, I’m still accepting applications.

Please tell me you wouldn't want to see this team make fools out of themselves just like the 1985 Bears did. You know what would be the result of a Colts Superbowl...more Peyton Manning commercials. This has been my best argument for the Bears yet.

3. The Legacy. How UGA fans or any SEC fan that didn't go to Tennessee is rooting for Peyton is beyond me. That guy is the highest paid player in the NFL and has more endorsements than Viagra. People probably think of Manning as the poster boy of the SEC...and why? He won 1 SEC title and 0 (zero) National Titles...yet if you ask who's the Greatest QB of SEC history Peyton Manning's name will always be at the top of the list. Huh? What about David Green? Doesn't he hold more records than Peyton? Didn't he win just as many SEC titles as Peyton did? This always kills me that David Green is probably #20 on everyone's list for SEC elite QBs and it fuels my hatred even more. I hope Peyton goes down as a poor man's Dan Marino. Go Bears!

2. The Result. I bet if the Bears win, it'll be a huge boost for Obama to grab that Democratic nomination. Does that statement have any merit? Absolutely not...I'm just trying to convince J-Mac with this one because every vote/fan in the Bears corner will help.

1. We've covered the fans, we've covered the cities, we've covered the significance, and we've covered the nostalgia. What's left to cover but to talk about? Me. Root for the Bears because you want your old pal Pasqua to have a "2006-like White Sox moment" again. It was one of the top 5 moments in my life when Uribe threw it over to Konerko for the final out. Granted, I'm a bigger fan of the White Sox than the Bears but if the Bears are able to pull it out on Sunday my family and I will all slide in another Top 10 moment together. Chicago's an odd town. You have two HUGE sports in Chicago...baseball and football. The top 5 moment I just referenced was probably one of the 10 worst sports moments in the lives of some of my Cub-fan friends and relatives. Football is the sport where every Chicagoan comes together and cheers as one. Sure, basketball is a nice option too...but football is Chicago's real love and the Bears encompass everything about that city. So, c'mon...I don't ask for much. In the words of the Superfans...

Bears 94
Colts -10

Frodo finally gets his due...

It's official...hobbits are real.

I've already put my down payment down on a nice place in Hobbitton

Thursday, January 25, 2007

Champ Bailey, Boss Bailey. It ends there.

UGA has lost out on the Allen Bailey Sweepstakes. This 1/2 man 1/2 beast will be committing to Alabama, Florida, or Miami. I, for one, am rooting for the Canes. What a fine program that Miami is and Bailey is the kind of kid that can turn it around (gulp). GET OUT OF THE SEC IF YOU'RE NOT COMING TO UGA, YA ISLAND MAN!!!

LUCKILY, we signed our 6th recruit for 2008. You heard it here first; when the recruiting class rankings for 2008 come out, UGA will be #1. No question.

Thanks to the Meim-ster for discussing Keane with me. The result of our discussion? Two "um...idunno's". But we sure did like it.

Huge, I'm talking HEEEYYYUUUGE win for UGA last night. If you didn't watch it, you missed one of the most entertaining games we've played. We've never played such a high paced game (seriously I thought Bliss was going to hurl every time he was in the game...which only came in 90 second increments), stage such an amazing comeback against a prolific team, and turn around a season in one night after such a devastating loss. Rally around this team, my UGA brothers and sisters, we're on the brink of the 64 team tourney!!! I can smell the first round loss now and it smells GOOOOOD.

Great optimistic outlook on UGA by Mark Bradley today. He sees us as a Sweet 16 team...I see us as a team that has a 50/50 shot at beating Kennesaw State Feb. 14. I guess it's just my pessimistic hangover from the football season.

JUMANGIIIII...heeee heeeee. Coach. Sub!!!

Monday, January 22, 2007

Suburban Chicago...I love ya again!

This article by Tim Placher a writer for the Daily Southtown in Chicago, a response to his co-worker Paul "I am a vile, cynical baseball writer that hates everything good about the sport I cover so I refuse to vote Cal and Tony into the Hall" Ladewski, pretty much sums up why Cal Ripken is one of the greatest players and all-around human being the sport of baseball has ever seen.

Note to Pasqua - Please observe Cal's praise for Chicago White Sox fans at the end of the article.

Friday, January 19, 2007

Da Kicker

I finally realized who Drew Butler looks like. Drew Butler is the son of Kevin Butler, former UGA kicker and the kicker of the 1985 World Champion Bears.

Drew looks exactly like...

Billy from "Big".

The space goes down, down baby, down, down the roller coaster. Sweet, sweet baby, sweet, sweet, don't let me go. Shimmy, shimmy, cocoa pop. Shimmy, shimmy, rock. Shimmy, shimmy, cocoa pop. Shimmy, shimmy, rock. I met a girlfriend - a triscuit. She said, a triscuit - a biscuit. Ice cream, soda pop, vanilla on the top. Ooh, Shelly's out, walking down the street, ten times a week. I read it. I said it. I stole my momma's credit. I'm cool. I'm hot. Sock me in the stomach three more times.

Man, I'd gladly watch "The Notebook" if Drew Butler promised to sign with UGA so I can make Billy from "Big" jokes for the next 5 years.

You're Josh Baskin, remember? You broke your arm on my roof! You hid in MY basement when Robert Dyson was about to rip your head off!


71 days and counting....

You can feel it coming. It's out there in the distance...like a beacon, like a beacon burning brightly fueled by the flaming, rotting carcasses of the dead college and NFL seasons. Opening Day. Major League Baseball Opening Day. Say it, let it course through your veins like high quality heroin bought off that dyslexic guy downtown in front of the Grill...what's his name? It's weird...like some sort of futuristic moniker that only the drug-adled could think up...Lorex! That's it. Holy crap...have I said too much? You catch the drift though....baseball, beloved baseball begins in just 71 days. Pitchers and catchers report to Spring Training in less than 30. And don't worry...I know you want to say it, so I'll just say it for you...it's about slam-damn time.
What my heaven looks like - see right there in the first row...behind the O's dugout...Jesus, Houdini and Charlamagne and it looks like Jesus is keeping score.

Why I am telling you all this...what has got me all caught up in a baseball tizzy (one of the fiercest tizzies imaginable)? Because today, after a week of vigilant checking, Barnett's Newstand downtown finally stocked the FIRST of the baseball preview magazines. Granted it's only the fantasy baseball preview, not the more in-depth team by team preview edition, but still it's the first sign that soon we can all stop pretending to care about the NFL and move on to the National Pastime.

So to just give you a taste to whet the insatiable baseball appetite we all harbor...I present to you the Sporting News Fantasy Baseball First Round Mock Draft:

1) Albert Pujols - no brainer at #1, the best hitter in baseball even if he is a Barry Bondsian whiner/bad teammate.

Respect his game, just don't look at him or talk to him if you're on his team.

2) Ryan Howard - a beast of a first baseman and only 27...so good it's scary.
3) A-Rod - I am not ashamed to say that I love A-Rod. He's one of favorite baseball superstars and I hope the Yankee fans boo him so much they are forced to trade him to Baltimore for a package that includes Haydenn Penn, Brian Roberts and Melvin Mora.
4) Alfonso Soriano - personally I would have probably chosen Soriano over A-Rod, just because of the stolen bases...though he is going to the Cubs which probably means he will be mauled by wolves in the Arizona desert during Spring Training, be involved in a tragic mini-putt accident while playing a foursome with Mark Prior, Kerry Wood and Steve Bartman, or suffer some other weird Cubsian disaster.
5) Johan Santana - Hmm...a pitcher this high? Not for me. But if you have to take a pitcher might as well take the best one in baseball...next to Erik Bedard that is.
6) Jose Reyes -Did you see this guy's numbers last year: .300+, 20 HR, 60+ SBs the kid is a beast and apparently is a force when playing Jenga.
7) Vlad - Again, I would have Vlad a little higher, probably ahead of both Johan and Reyes purely for his consistency and he's got a great name and swings like he's strung out on Lorex's good stuff.

Is he about to crush a homerun or club a litter of excess puppies to death? Who cares...it's just Vlad bein' Vlad.

8) Carl Crawford - Has about the same numbers as Reyes but Reyes is a shortstop. Still he's got da skillz as the fly fresh youngstahs would say. If he gets traded to an actual Major League team his stock would sky-rocket. Somehow I just think I would be dissapointed if I came out of the first round with Carl.
9) David Ortiz - Would refuse to draft him purely because he is a whiny, sissy, Red Sock. If I'm taking a DH in the first round I'd take my bizz-oy Hafner.
10) Chase Utley - I will never forgive myself for dropping Utley the first week of the season a couple of years ago when I found out that he would be platooning with Placido Polanco. I consider that the worst mistake I've ever made in my life next to murdering my imaginary childhood friend Steve...yeah...imaginary.
11) Lance Berkman - Really Sporting News? Lance Berkman? No doubt he had a monster year last year but he's an oft injured power hitter at a position where there are a million power hitters. I think I would rather have a Beltran, Ichiro, Bay, or Tejada here.
12) Miguel Cabrera - This kid is 23! Can you believe that? Seems like he's been around for ever. Great hitter who will only get better assuming he doesn't eat his weight in chicken fingers over the offseason.

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Like riding a bike, eh?

I apologize for interrupting your focus as you break down the 8 player BLOCKBUSTER trade that just went down in the NBA...but I gotta blog it up. It's been a while. The honest reason is mostly laziness...but sprinkle a little "I'm trying to sell my condo and I've been constantly cleaning" into the normal "busy" mix and I think I got a hell of an excuse. No? You don't think so? Well, piss off and scroll down to the bottom of this entry.

Now do I have your attention? Well, good. This entry is meant to be a sports/pop culture/politics Schmogasboard...so I'm going to spout out what needs to be said bullet-style.
  • Thanks to JMass for totally ballooning my expectations for "Children of Men" and the 4 hour season premier of "24". Both were good, but "COM" wasn't better than any movie since the '80s (it's probably not in my Top 3 for this year for cry eye) and "24" was same old "24". Someone you like dies, something shocking happens. As a matter of fact,
  • "24" deserves it's own bullet point, don't cha think? Granted I've only seen one full season of "24" but the formula is becoming as predictable as a Marcus Giles at bat. Seems to me that the writers realize that each year has to get more shocking to hold the attention of the viewers. President assassinated last year in the first episode, friggin nuclear weapon explodes on U.S. soil in the premier this season. There's was a preview of next week's episode where Bauer explains to Bill "I'm back in this now" since the bomb went off. Well, Jack, I guess that's the case for me too. But, like you, Jack, it's against my will. What's the shocker for next year? 1/2 the world explodes? Jack Bauer realizes that he can go down on himself? Sorry...was that a little too much? A little too shocking? Don't tell Fox, otherwise JB will be giving himself BJ's next year for the "shock value." Clever aren't I?
  • Anyone else still watch The Apprentice? Didn't think so. Real quick, though, this season the losers of the tasks have to sleep in a big tent called..."Tent City". I wonder where the Donald got that idea (I would link to the AJC article...but it's no longer available).
  • Speaking of all things tailgating, who's ready for college football to be back? First game's in 3 weeks right? Well, shoot. At least there's still recruiting. Rival's new Top 100 came out today. A few of UGA's recruits moved up way up in the rankings, specifically Aron White, who was previously outside the Top 100 and now is #38 as well as Antwane Greenlee, now # 65 who continues to worry me since he flaked out on FSU to come to UGA and is still talking to FSU. I'm going to nickname Greenlee "The Flake"...I don't think he'll mind. According to Rivals, Caleb King is now our 5th best recruit, which comforts me a bit since my Dad tutors Caleb's sister and she claims that Caleb got a, well, let's just say that he didn't do so well on the SAT. Hello Hargrave. UGA still has some blue chippers on the big board, specifically Cameron Heyward (Ironhead's boy who'll probably go to OSU), and Allen Bailey (dude lives on a friggin island). Other than that, we're pretty much finished up. Expect a Top 15 class...but the main objective was achieved since we'll sign 8 offensive lineman (5 of which are already on campus).
  • Staying on the sports path, what are the Braves thinking? I think Gonzalez will be a fine reliever, but I thought they had a closer in Wickman. LaRoche has the potential, now that he's on medication, to be one of the best left handed power hitters in the game. Look at his numbers in the 2nd half of last season. At the 80th game of last year LaRoche was hitting .237 with a .321 OBP. By the end of the season, his average was up to .285 and the OBP was at .354. Wouldn't you let that momentum ride into 2007? I don't understand why the Braves suffered through the growing pains of LaRoche for 3 years, then when he finally hits his stride, they deal him. It's like holding onto Apple stock for 3 years and selling it right before they released the plans for the iPhone. Oh well, at least Schuerholz got it right with "Cross Eye".

ah herrr. Derrr.

  • Seriously, still nobody has seen Keane? I ned to talk to someone about this movie.
  • I'm interested to see what JMac thinks about this next point. Sonny Perdue wants to make Georgia the fishing capital of the world. I agree that it's going to improve the state economy and probably be good for the environment. But c'mon...let's be honest. Sonny wanted to improve something he loves doing. Wouldn't adding a wing to some museum improve the economy? Wouldn't improving the highways allow workers to get to work quicker and improve the economy? Nope...fishing. Ridiculous, and, don't get me wrong, the only reason it's ridiculous is because I don't fish. If I were governor, I'd be getting pressure from Stanicek and a bunch of others to put $19 million into the state Tailgating Budget and I'd spin it that it would be great for the economy since we'll be encouraging visitors to tailgate in Georgia. How is nobody calling him out on this?
The last great basketball teams were the Lakers and Celtics from the mid-'80s. Both were blessed with selfless superduperstars (Bird and Magic), genuine Hall of Famers (McHale and Parish for Boston; Worthy and Kareem for the Lakers) and valuable role players (DJ, Ainge and Walton for Boston; Cooper, Scott and Green for the Lakers). And both teams reached heights that haven't been approached since. They were the last two teams that dominated in a competitive league and routinely submitted those occasional "not only are we winning this game by 25 points, just send the tape to Springfield after it's over" games.

Not even a mention of the Bulls teams that would've won 8 titles in a row if MJ didn't retire. Not even a mention.


Would the '86 Celtics have beaten the '96 Bulls in a seven-game series? Too difficult to say. For instance, Pippen would have guarded Bird in that series, and there wasn't anyone remotely resembling Scottie Pippen in 1986. So how could you know? Compare their relative impacts and it's a different story. The '86 Celtics were greater than the '96 Bulls because they excelled against tougher competition, they were invincible at home (50-1 at home if you include playoff games) and their top-six was better than Chicago's top-six. You will never convince me otherwise.

I know everyone's getting bored with me talking about NBA, so I'll keep this short. Michael Jordan put up 63 on the Celtics in 1986 when he didn't have a supporting cast and took them to overtime BY HIMSELF when he was just 23 years old. And just because there wasn't a player like Pippen in 1986 doesn't mean that he doesn't count...he would've shut down Bird like no other. Ask Magic in 1991 when Pippen owned him in a non-sensual sense.

  • There...no more basketball. Happy? OK, this is long enough. Gotta save some material for my book tour. GO BEARS!!!...oh, and sneak another peak at my rump.

now, mind ya bizness and keep reading

Giles arrested!

This is the kind of energy Atlanta needs! Too bad the Braves gave up on this sparkplug...looks like it will be another lackluster year for the Braves, led by guys like LaRoche who can barely keep his eyes open on the field.

If you're like me, frothing with excitement over the prospect that Opening Day is less than 74 days away (as you can see by the countdown clock to your right)...check out this...pitchers and catchers report in LESS THAN 30 DAYS!!!!

Thursday, January 11, 2007

Whack Jack....

The season premiere of "24" is right around the corner and I have to say...If Jack doesn't get knocked off soon I am going to bail on this show. (Spoiler alert for anyone who hasn't seen last season yet) I can't explain to you how dissapointed I was with the season finale last year...no substance, no shock, just the President getting placed in a limo and some stupid red herring "cliffhanger" ending. I commented on this over at JMac's blog last year but with the new season creeping up I thought I would chime in one last time. How great would it have been if at the end of last year when that Chinese official had Jack on his knees, gun to his head...he just pulled the trigger it all goes dark and the season is over?! Fantastic! Fox could continue to ride the Keif-nami by just doing a few prequel seasons...what happened to Jack down in Mexico when he got hooked on smack, that's a season. How did Jack get to CTU in the first place, what sort of wacky missions did he take part in as an up and coming agent, that's a season. But as of right now...this show is going nowhere.

Which brings me to my problem with TV shows in general, particularly serial dramas. The writers have to fill upwards of 25 shows a season which means that really all you need to do is watch the first five and last five episodes of each season...all the rest is just filler and meaningless conundrums that the characters get out of. That's why I can't bring myself to watch any sort of serial drama outside of "Lost" and "24" (sorry "Heroes")...because I know from episode 6 to 20, no matter how exciting it looks, nothing is going to happen. Why force yourself to watch 25 hours of programming when a movie crams as much plot into two hours? TV shows drraaaggggg themselves out waaaaaayyyy too long. And as for "Lost"...if it goes past 5 seasons I might have to take the train to "See ya-ville". I can't justify spending thousands of hours of my life watching a show that gets so convulted and drawn out that I don't even understand the end even when it comes (see: X-Files).

Unless you are referring to "30 Rock", "Curb Your Enthusiasm" and any episode of "The Office" that has ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to do whatsoever with Jim loving Pam and vice versa.

So shake it up "24", kill Jack, do prequels, break the mold, go the distance, do the Dew and other associated and various slogans and/or cliches.

Tuesday, January 09, 2007

Hall of Fame Part 2

In what was really only a formality, it was announced today that Cal Ripken, Jr. , the greatest shortstop in baseball history, will be inducted into the National Baseball Hall of Fame in July. The only dissapointing news is that eight idiotic baseball writers out of 545 failed to include the Iron Man on their ballots and should have their credentials revoked and fingernails removed slowly and methodically. There is absolutely no good reason to leave Ripken or Gwynn off a ballot, the are the definition of a Hall of Famer. These writers were only trying to make a buck and get their face on ESPN...good job fellas you prevented two of the all-around greatest players to ever take the field from making history so you could get blasted by John Kruk on Baseball Tonight...you are all class.

Monday, January 08, 2007

Hall of Fame Part 1

Athenians, music lovers, and lead singers who like to wear glitter and blue eyeshadow rejoiced today as it was announced that R.E.M. will be inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in March. Also on the inductee list, Van Halen, fellow Georgia football-Tent City denizen John Hart's favorite band...do I smell tailgating on the streets of New York in front of the Waldorf-Astoria? I'll bring the herring salad, you bring the TV and we'll drink the day away while clogging up traffic by playing cornhole on Broadway.

Sunday, January 07, 2007

I hate suburban Chicago.....

No one in their right mind could mount a worthwhile argument that Gwynn and Ripken shouldn't be the first unanimous Hall of Famers in history. However, this jacka** from Chicago clearly is jonesing for some attention and will prevent these two greats from achieving that honor.

Of the 178 members of the BBWAA who answered the question about Ripken's induction, only one, Paul Ladewski, a columnist for the Daily Southtown in suburban Chicago, said he didn't vote for Ripken. "In an attempt to uphold the Hall of Fame standards established by their predecessors, I will not vote for anyone who played in the 1993-2004 period, which I consider to be the Steroids Era," Ladewski wrote in an e-mail to The Sun last month. "That includes Tony Gwynn, Mark McGwire and Cal Ripken Jr."The San Diego Union-Tribune did a similar poll as it applied to Gwynn's candidacy, and of the 233 responses it received, only Ladewski said he would have reservations about voting for the Padres' eight-time batting champion.Ladewski, a BBWAA member since 1984, confirmed last week that he submitted a blank ballot, which, in effect, will be counted as a "No" vote for all candidates."It's not an anti-Cal Ripken vote or an anti-Tony Gwynn vote; it's a vote about not knowing enough, in my opinion, of the Steroids Era and performance-enhancing drugs to make the kind of decision that needs to be made," Ladewski said."From my dealings with Cal Ripken Jr. in the past, he was very pleasant, a good ambassador for the game, and his numbers speak for themselves," Ladewski said. "But I don't have enough information on the [steroids] subject to make a decision."

NOT an anti-Ripken vote? NOT an anti-Gwynn vote? Sure, you're punishing two of the greatest, most respected, most revered players in baseball history for the sins of that steroid-pumping cheater McGwire...but that's not anti-Gwynn or anti-Ripken. I knew I hated suburban Chicago...and anyone from there.

Saturday, January 06, 2007


Is Bill Simmons trying to get back on my good side or is he just trying to f with me? First he blasts Cal Ripken for no good reason, then he asserts that anyone that doesn't vote for McGwire into the Hall of Fame is a crackpot...so just when I thought I couldn't loathe this guy any worse (remember he already has 2 3/4 strikes against him off the bat because he is a Red Sox fan) he goes and writes a column in which he showers college football with love AND, more importantly, links to a story penned by my brother-in-law (its in the box to the right of the column, #3 under the title "Listen Up") for the Washington Post and saying it will restore your faith in sports journalism. I'm going to have to climb a Himalayan moutaintop and meditate about this whole Bill Simmons thing...I'm so torn...wait....no I'm not...he trashed Ripken AND he's a Red Sox fan...that's unforgiveable.

Thursday, January 04, 2007


Got 10 minutes and need a laugh?

A REAL sportswriter chimes in on the Hall of Fame...

Good ole Ken Rosenthal...here is an INTELLIGENT article regarding the Hall of Fame (i.e. not back to back columns blasting Cal Ripken and then claiming it is OUTRAGEOUS for anyone to think that Mark McGwire shouldn't be in the Hall of Fame). Please note Ken's observations regarding Cal's fielding so stick it Pasqua...unless you know more about baseball than a guy that has covered baseball every day of his life for the past 20 years.

Wednesday, January 03, 2007

This is how ya do it

Well crafted argument by one of my favorite writers. I wish I could explain myself so clearly. Long live the BCS!!!

Rebuttal to the most asinine column ever printed; or: Bill Simmons = Stalin

Read that "article" by hack "sports" writer Bill Simmons (who in actuality writes more about the non-sport NBA and 90210 and the OC than real sports like baseball or college football so can he really be qualified as a sports writer?)...needless to say that is the last time I ever read his filth again. Basically an ode to irresponsibility and everything that is wrong with sports today...Simmons disputes Cal Ripken's greatness and touts the greatness of such "heroes" as Mark McGwire. I received this article courtesy of an email from JMac and responded to him in the following manner...let this also serve as my response to my less honorable friend Pasqua who simply went ahead and posted this trash on our shared blog:

The whole story is ridiculous to me because the whole premise of the article is that Cal was not "great" because he didn't pump himself full of illegal drugs so he could club 800 foot homeruns (a la McGwire and Bonds), be a complete prima donna and utter attention whore AND pump himself full of illegal drugs (a la Pedro and Gooden), because in actuality he really wasn't that great of a player but ooooh! He did backflips before a game (a la Ozzie Smith), or because he wasn't the undisputed "best player in the history of the game" (a la Jordan).

Listen...Simmons' and I just don't evaluate baseball players in the same way...by his own admission in this article he is qualifying "greatness" almost purely on charisma...and admittedly Cal didn't have it. Cal didn't do cartwheels before games, Cal didn't start bench clearing brawls by hitting opposing playes in the head, Cal didn't take illegal drugs and turn into a behemoth at the age of 37, Cal didn't ruin his sporting career ane become a footnote of sports history by playing two sports. Cal didn't demand the media spotlight every single night by faking illnesses and slinking off to bars instead. And really this is what it boils down to...Simmons is a Red Sox fan...he loves the drama...the intrigue...the Mannys and Pedros of the world...he wants his players to be media whores...Cal was not that.

Wait...which one of these did Simmons say was "great"?

Cal did everything the Orioles, his team and his managers asked of him with the diginity and skill of a Hall of Famer. Cal didn't need to make miraculous plays at shortstops constantly because he used his intelligence, because he studied that game so meticulously and each batter so carefully that he would set himself up perfectly to turn amazing plays into routine groundballs. Cal wasn't in the playoffs every year because unfortunately he had to play for one of the worst owners in baseball history. Cal was a force in the middle of the lineup for the Orioles for over two decades and while his numbers in this steroid-fueled age (which is perpetuated by douchebags like Simmons who demand players to have "charisma" or "WOW-factor) don't seem quite as gawdy now he was the definition of the type of player you wanted batting third in the 80s. Cal redefined the position of shortstop for future playes like A-Rod and Nomar...without Cal there is no A-Rod. Before Cal all shortstops were wirey, fast, no-hit fielding specialists. Cal made it OK for a 6'5" power hitting athlete to play the position. Cal is and was the epitome of all that is right with baseball...I'll let Bill Simmons keep his Pedros, Barrys, Mannys, and McGwires...I'll take Cal or Tony Gwynn (Tony fits Bill Simmons' anti-Cal criteria to a tee) any day.


PS - It should be noted that Bill Simmons is just plain wrong about Cal's numbers "declining" because of the streak"...first of all there is his 1991 MVP season a full 9 years after the Streak started, he was on pace during the 1994 strike-shortened year to hit .315 with 20+HRs and 100+RBIs, he batted .280 with 26 HRs and 100+RBIs in 1996 and batted .340 with 20 HRs at the age of 38 in 1999 after the Streak of 2632 consecutive games was completed.


Someone just cried while reading an article...and that someone is Stanicek. Hahaha. Eat it. I think Simmons could've replaced Ripken's name with Palmeiro's and the article still would've worked. It would've enabled him to write another few paragraphs about what a liar he is too.

Also, has anyone ever seen the movie Keane? I enjoyed it but have no idea what the hell was going on. Help.